Havent been blogging for quite some time. Well, as usual busy with work & partying with friends. Met someone new... Well he is mature & stable enough, knows what he wants & everything. We had comes to agreement bout the open relationship topic & both parties agreed. Well, so what even if i don't agreed.... Till the end there will only be lies & betrayed. Just enjoy what i have now, enjoy the process of being pampered....

Had a sudden mood swing out of sudden this evening. I know i shoudn't but it still happen.... Smiling, laughing & joking all the way but still will keep things going like what it is regardless of whats underneath....

A motto for myself - No one will ever love you more than yourself.....

A Month Had Past & Yet Im Still Thinking.... I Know I Should Stop All These Thought Cause Its Impossible For Us Anymore. But Still I Cant Help To Conntrol What Im Thinking. Had Ask Myself If There Is One More Chance, Will I Still Accept It? Honestly Speaking, I Wish We Could But I Know In The End I Will Get Hurt Again..... Morever I Guess A New Date Or R/S Had Just Begun At His Side.... Im Trying My Best Not To Turn Back Again Into This Kind Of R/S, Just Tired.... Indeed He Is The One Who Changed Me Alot So Far This Year. Change Me Into A Selfish Person In Love, A Person Who Dun Have Faith In Love Anymore. Make Me Believe More In, Whatever I Give In, I Will Not Get Back The Same. Most Importantly Is, Will Not Trust Anyone Easily Even When I Really In Love With That Person. No One Is Worth Anything..... All Sweet Talk Are Bullshit. And Will Not Be So Naive Anymore To Believe Or Take Things So Seriously.... No More I Love You From Me To Anyone From Now Onwards, Goes The Same To Anyone To Me. Action Speaks Louder Than Words !!!! Karma Is Always Around Us, What You Do To Others, You Will Get Double In Return..........

I HATE MYSELF........... !!!!!!!!!!

Had A Tiring Week So Far, Seems Like Everything Is Not Going On Smoothly For Me. At This Point Of Time My Mind Is Always Filled With Thoughts. This, That & Everythings That Happened In My Life.

Always Ask Myself How Come I Landed Where I Am Now, But Till Now I Still Cant Get A Definite Answer From Myself. What I Hope For Is Just A Simple Life With My Love One. Ask Myself Today, What Im Seeking In A R/S Now, Is What I Really Want? To Be Honest I Really Dont Know. Ask Myself Another Question, Exactly How Many People I Really Love So Far? The Answer Is 2.... And How Many Peoples' Love I Did Feel In Return? And The Answer Is 1.... Lastly, So Far How Many People Try To Date & Love Me & Lastly Got My Love In Return Too? The Answer Is 0.... Realise One Thing Which Alot Of People Did. I Love You This 3 Words Is Easily Said Between Couple, But How Many People Actually Really Did What They Say? To Be Honest I Had Said It Alot Of Times To Some Of My Ex, Now Than I Realise There Is Only 2 Person Which I Said It From My Heart. The Rest Are All Say For The Sake For The R/S. Know Is Kinda Bad, So I Did Learn Something From Myself Too, Never Say I Love You Easily Again....

Havent Really Been Really Happy Since 08/02/2010..... Though I Lost, But I Think I Gain Experience At The Same Time. Cant Forcus On Anything Im Doing, Probably Becoz Of This Reason My Work Screwed Up..... Kept Forcing Myself To Forcus When I Know I Cant, Ended Up Become More Agitated.... Argh..... Think I Need To Have A Rest Soon After Everything Is Settled In Work....

Wants To Post Happy Things Here, But Nothing Seems Happy So Far..... Joining Mango To Bed Now. Nightz To The Whole World & Hugs To "U"....

Once Again Today Is Chinese New Year & It Also Falls On Valentines' Day. Hereby Wish Everyone A Happy Chinese New Year & Also Happy Valentines' Day.

Dun Really Have Any Mood FOr This 2 Occasions, Mum & Sis Went To Relatives' House For Home Visiting While I Rather Choose To Stay At Home To Watch TV. Suppose To Plan To Cook For A Simple Dinner Today For One Of This Occasion But Ended Up Cooking Mee....

Was Watching Mob TV Just Now, Channel 8 Drama Series- Your Hand In Mine. Miss Holding Hand To Sleep. Its Been 1 Week That I Had lost This Feel. Have I Really Move On? I Thought I Am Happy The Past 2 Days Till Yesterday Than I Realise What Im Thinking Is Only From My Side. What I Wish For Is Only Be Like The Past When We Are Still Frens, Nothing More. Dun Make Things So Complicated Is Just What I Got As A Reply, Sometimes Im Really Confuse...

Was Talking To A Fren Yesterday, Ask Him Out To Chill. But He Told Me That This Day Is Specially Left For His Love One Only. So Envy.... Was Thinking How Nice If I Can Spend This Meaningful Occasion Also. Its Been A Long Time Since I Last Celebrate... Its One Of The Most Memorable Occasion That Im Waiting For To Celebrate If I Have Any Also....

Lastly To All Couples Out There HAppy Valentines' Day & Wish You and Your Loves One Loving Till The End. For Those Who Are Single, May U Find Your Love One Soon....

So Happy Today..... Clearing Up Stuffs In The Wardrobe But Still Left Somethings Untouch. Happy For What It Is Now. I Dun Really Expect Too Much But Hopefully Will Remain What It Is Now. I Will Definitely Learn To Feel Content For Getting This Precious Opportunity. No Matter What.... Im Just Happy Today.... Hope It Will Remain This Way As Long As Possible....

When out for advance Chinese New Year lunch today with team mates. Everything was fine, nice foods and etc. Smile & jokes around till when everyone ask me where is he..... this & that till i dun know what to say, only reason is to say he is busy helping at home preparing for chinese new year stuff. My mind suddenly think of alot of things again. When will it stop.....

Heard from of few frens saying that probably im too sticky in a relationship but i do have given his own freedom if he wants to. I remember when we stated our r/s, i ask that will he get bored if he sees me everyday. The only reply is, maybe you (who is me) are the one who will get bored first. At that time i was very very happy, coz i thought that i had found someone who loves the companion of his own bf. But after awhile hearing 3 frens saying im a little too sticky, asking me to give him his own privacy i feel so sad, but just kept quiet.

Anyway, once again had told myself not to be a "super glue" anymore in my future r/s. If you want my companion, just come. If not just go and find your own programme. Will not take things so serious next time anymore especially the beginning of the r/s, coz those are the words that hurts you the most in the end.

Anyway am trying to to let go now le. Better now compare to the previous days. Am trying to treat us how we used to be before 27/08/2009. Chat in msn, call him or meet him up for leisure if he is still ok with that beside work. Everthing will back to square one.....